had a somewhat disjointed chat with SO tonight about a conversation I had today with someone else about marriage after divorce.
the original conversation basically boils down to "it's scary thinking about marriage again, after a divorce."
the conversation with my boyfriend went all over the place, perhaps because we both might have been avoiding being definite about anything to do with marriage. I'm not sure about him, but I know I was.
it's a tricky subject.
theoretically, I believe in marriage. I don't know that I want to be married. I don't know that I don't want to be married, either. I know I don't need to be married to be in a committed relationship. so, I do believe in the concept of marriage, or as my boyfriend put it, a formal expression of commitment. I'll admit it, the thought has crossed my mind, a lot. sometimes I can very clearly picture it. other times, it scares the shit out of me.
despite everything, I still also believe in the symbols of marriage, in particular wedding rings. realistically though, I know better. wearing a wedding ring means shit to a lot of people. but to me, it's an outward symbol of an inward commitment.
I do believe in two people making a commitment to one another, whether it's in a legal marriage or not. I like the idea of having an outward, recognizable sign of that commitment. maybe it's because I'm female and because I like jewelry. but I think that's just a small part of it. even though I know plenty of other people don't view it the same way, I still see a ring as part of the boundaries of the commitment.
sigh, it's scary thinking about marriage, after a divorce...
the original conversation basically boils down to "it's scary thinking about marriage again, after a divorce."
the conversation with my boyfriend went all over the place, perhaps because we both might have been avoiding being definite about anything to do with marriage. I'm not sure about him, but I know I was.
it's a tricky subject.
theoretically, I believe in marriage. I don't know that I want to be married. I don't know that I don't want to be married, either. I know I don't need to be married to be in a committed relationship. so, I do believe in the concept of marriage, or as my boyfriend put it, a formal expression of commitment. I'll admit it, the thought has crossed my mind, a lot. sometimes I can very clearly picture it. other times, it scares the shit out of me.
despite everything, I still also believe in the symbols of marriage, in particular wedding rings. realistically though, I know better. wearing a wedding ring means shit to a lot of people. but to me, it's an outward symbol of an inward commitment.
I do believe in two people making a commitment to one another, whether it's in a legal marriage or not. I like the idea of having an outward, recognizable sign of that commitment. maybe it's because I'm female and because I like jewelry. but I think that's just a small part of it. even though I know plenty of other people don't view it the same way, I still see a ring as part of the boundaries of the commitment.
sigh, it's scary thinking about marriage, after a divorce...
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