This has got to be one of the biggest lines of shit that ever get uttered. Seriously.
Resilience: an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change (thank you Merriam-Webster.com)
Recover from or adjust easily.... seems to me that people who say kids are resilient forget the "easily" part of the definition.
What kids are is adaptable. (adapt: to make fit, often by modification). Adults too, for that matter. but I want to talk about kids tonight. Specifically, kids who through no fault of their own, have to suffer through their parents' divorces. These kids are adaptable. They make modifications, to make life somehow fit once again.
They do not recover from nor adjust easily to these changes.
There is nothing easy about divorce, especially for the kids. No matter how old they are. Nothing is easy.
And it sucks.
Tonight I logged into faceback, and there in bright blue letters against the white background, the son of one of my friends is now going by a new last name. My friend's maiden name. The name she took back after her divorce.
I don't know the reasons, and I don't know if this is a permanent change or just the anger of a young man coming out in a public "fuck you" to his dad/dad's family. But I do know that if someone has recovered from or adjusted easily to the divorce of his parents, if he is resilient, he doesn't willingly relinquish his father's name.
People who think kids are resilient are deluding themselves. Kids are adaptable. They will make changes. But it doesn't come easily. It comes at great cost.
There is nothing that is easy about a kid surviving their parents' divorce.
Resilience: an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change (thank you Merriam-Webster.com)
Recover from or adjust easily.... seems to me that people who say kids are resilient forget the "easily" part of the definition.
What kids are is adaptable. (adapt: to make fit, often by modification). Adults too, for that matter. but I want to talk about kids tonight. Specifically, kids who through no fault of their own, have to suffer through their parents' divorces. These kids are adaptable. They make modifications, to make life somehow fit once again.
They do not recover from nor adjust easily to these changes.
There is nothing easy about divorce, especially for the kids. No matter how old they are. Nothing is easy.
And it sucks.
Tonight I logged into faceback, and there in bright blue letters against the white background, the son of one of my friends is now going by a new last name. My friend's maiden name. The name she took back after her divorce.
I don't know the reasons, and I don't know if this is a permanent change or just the anger of a young man coming out in a public "fuck you" to his dad/dad's family. But I do know that if someone has recovered from or adjusted easily to the divorce of his parents, if he is resilient, he doesn't willingly relinquish his father's name.
People who think kids are resilient are deluding themselves. Kids are adaptable. They will make changes. But it doesn't come easily. It comes at great cost.
There is nothing that is easy about a kid surviving their parents' divorce.
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