3 years down, 2 to go

Sometime around my birthday 3 years ago I started thinking up my 5 year plan. I didn't have anything definite at the time, but I was thinking.

3 years ago I was still married, but in what turned out to be false reconciliation. It was 6 months after d-day#1 and I knew the reconciliation was not going well. I wasn't ready to even consider the idea that it was false reconciliation, that now-ex was still cheating, that he could see the devastation and pain I was in and still continue to hurt me like that.

But very, very slowly I was inching my way towards processing it all, and accepting that my life had changed/was going to change even more, in ways I never expected. It would take me 3 more months before I was ready to find out the truth and find the secret cell phone, but in March 2009 all I knew was that my 50th birthday (meaning my life at 50) was going to be a hell of a lot different than my 45th.

All things considered, my 45th birthday wasn't all bad. I planned and threw myself a fabulous party. I got shitfaced drinking margaritas and doing tequila shots. I spent the evening with some of the best, most supportive friends a woman can have. But the party was a bubble in time. Outside that bubble, the reality of my life sucked. And that's the life I was already planning on changing, so that it would be different by the time I was 50.

At the time I was still hoping that it would be different because my marriage would be different (aka better) and that my then-husband was sincere in his efforts to work on the marriage. But I also knew I had work to do on myself, and that I needed to make myself a priority in my own life. I wasn't sure what or how I needed to do this, but like I said, I started thinking.

I have to say I really didn't put "the plan" all together until after now-ex walked out on the kids and me, which was a bit over 4 months after my birthday. Oh, I had bits and pieces of it in my head, but I hadn't worked out the entire 5 years. I pulled the pieces together pretty quick when I had to, though.

So....3 years down the line there's a pretty long list of the things I've accomplished. I went back to school. I stabilized life for my kids, and kept them in the only home they've ever known. I got a job. I met someone new and have been in a relationship with him for a little over 2 years now. I was able to afford to replace old appliances in the house. I bought a car. I have a new wardrobe, and oh yeah, I have a whole bunch of sexy and/or cute shoes again.

Believe it or not, all of those were part of my 5 year plan. Now, they didn't all happen when or how I planned, but they happened. The job - that took a lot longer to find than I had planned. The boyfriend? He came along, very unexpectedly, much sooner than I ever considered. The new car - oh yeah, so didn't plan to have to get a new one because my old vehicle got totaled in a wreck. But ya know what, it all worked out for the best. Because of my plans, or maybe despite of them.

And now...I have just about 2 years left of my plan. Two years before I'm 50. I've got more school ahead of me, which changes my original plan, but that's okay because I'm going back after my original degree, if I can.  There may also be some other life changes I'll make that weren't part of the original plan, because...well, because I didn't expect to find love again so early into my plan. That was supposed to be a towards the end of the plan goal. lol

I don't know exactly where I'll be when I turn 50, but I do know that I will have reached the goals I set for myself 3 years ago. I also know I'll be throwing myself another fabulous party, and I will be celebrating with the best, most supportive friends a woman could ever have, old and new. Although, maybe I'll skip the tequila shots this time.

Then again, sometimes ya just never know how plans will work out...:p